Terrans - A Race For Real Men
Terran are the most volatile romp n stomp habanero chili boomshakalaka slam dunk descendants from Spartan warriors while drinking blood of roman gladiators bad ass race out there. If you dont play Terran you can never call yourself a real man.
 
Marines - These bad asses will fight anything. Land, sea, air, bring it the fuck on because if they are in range marines will shoot at it. Not to mention the fact that they are such hard bastards they still use shields in an era where intergalactic space travel is possible.
 
Marauders - Some marine was sitting around one day chomping down on an MRE when his buddy was like, Hey Magnus (damn straight he has a manly name like Magnus) I think we need a better way to kill things, so Magnus was like I agree, strap on some rocket fucking launchers to my arms and I'll start blowing shit up. And he did, and it was good.
 
Did I mention the fact that marines and marauders are willing to inject themselves with who knows what in order to shoot things faster, at the cost of their own health ! Real men willing to sacrifice.
 
Reapers - These crazy bastards are willing to have giant jets strapped on to their backs so they can jump up and down cliffs. Massive exhaust flames centimeters away from their asses, all while going to fight with nothing more than two hand held pistols and some grenades. JET PACK ON THEIR BACK, WHILE CARRYING GRENADES. When asked about logic reapers were quoted as saying “logic is for casuals”.
 
Ghosts – If smoking is cool, ghosts go through 4 packs while laying down some love on the Marlboro man’s wife, and mom, at the same time. Remember when EMPs were only available on massive floating science research facilities ? Ghosts were all like “fuck that shit, I’ll carry them”. Nuclear Launch Detected: Nothing is manlier than radioactive devastation.
 
Hellions – One day a couple of Terrans were driving around the desert in dune buggies, and they decided it would be an awesome idea to attach massive flamethrowers to them so they could burn shit to the ground while hitting some massive jumps. Oh are you trying to mine some minerals? *FWOOOOOM* not anymore.
 
Medivacs – SUCK ON MY GREEN LASER BITCHES WHILE I FLY AROUND CARRYING SOME TANKS DICKFACE !
 
Siege Tank – Siege tanks are as manly as it gets. Brace for fucking impact while they blast away at your measly army; and you might think they brace for impact because of the shells they fire off. Little did you know the real reason is to counteract the sheer orgasmic force released when the tank drivers fire off onto the approaching force. Their hardness of their balls is comparable to the surface of a neutron star. Oh yeah…..
 
Thor – Were you seriously going to question the manliness of a Thor? What is your major malfunction?

 
Battlecruisers - Your dad can beat up my dad ? Well Battlecruisers can beat up all dads, everywhere, at the same damn time. They dont need to move fast because they are so damn important people will wait. Sure fire away at me while I charge up my Yamato cannon and BLOW YOU TO SMITHEREENS.
 
Terrans: Race of the year - All years.
 

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